Carny Fun

Cheese: Norwegian Jarlsberg (approx 100g)

I had this dream a few days ago, it was quite bizarre and a little difficult to piece together afterwards.

I was at some sort of festival or carnival with my wife and some friends. There were all sorts of rides and weird and wonderful sights there. Clowns, people on stilts, people breathing fire, game stalls, everything really.

My wife was wearing a very short dress and was quite drunk and was generally leading the merry dance as we wandered from stall to stall and field to field. She seemed to be loving it and absolutely in her element.

At one point we went into a circus tent where comedian and television presenter Rufus Hound was the ring master. He was taming lions, in a big hat that had 'Lion Tamer' written on it in big neon letters.

Unfortunately he wasn't very good at it, as one of the lions chewed his arm off. But credit to him, he fought back with the other arm, and continued to whip the lions with one arm, while the other spurted blood. The loss of blood was causing him to become less coherent and clearly less conscious. Thankfully Jimmy Carr came in and managed to drag him out.

Unfortunately Jimmy Carr was not eaten by the lions, although we were all shouting at the lions to eat him.

When we left the tent it was dark, and we went to a stone circle where my mate who now lives in Australia was twirling his firestaff standing on top of one of the stones. When he saw me he got down and we started chatting. He said he was in town for the carnival but was going back to Australia very shortly. He said he had some spare tickets and me and my wife should go with him.

I was well up for a free trip to Australia. He said to meet him at the airport. We continued to explore the festival, my wife was also up for going to Australia, but was also easily distracted by the bright lights of the carnival. She was also pretty wankered on what I think was strawberry cider.

Co-ordinating her became rather difficult. I managed to get her in the vicinity of the car so I could try and get some stuff packed, but I started to realise that getting home to pack and then getting to the airport wasn't going to happen.

We tried to head home but there was a massive queue leaving the carnival, my mate rang me while we trying to get out, and we'd missed the flight. I was gutted. The festival had been ace though, and I'd got to see my friend.

Freakiness: 8
Nightmare Factor: 7
Amusement Factor: 7
Enjoyability: 6
Coherence: 2
Vividness: 5