Return of the Cheese Surfer

The Cheese Surfer has returned. The hiatus was longer than planned, but it's pretty difficult to try and note down a dream when you've been woken by a screaming baby who needs feeding. However, Cheese Surfer jr is now sleeping pretty well.

The improved sleeping of Cheese Surfer jr has meant that I can recommence by surfing adventures once again.

Cheese: Brie de Meaux (approx. 120g)

A few months off surfing and I'm back with giant creamy wave of cheesy psychedelia. This one was a bit nuts!

I was staying in a tent with my US based uncle, which was strange, because of everyone I've ever met in my life he is the least likely to ever stay in a tent. Even less likely than my mother which is really saying something.

The next day we got up and we seemed to be in a shopping mall. We met up with my aunt and cousins, before going to the car park and driving off in a small jeep. We drove off and found ourselves on a coastal road. I was driving and decided it would be fun to drive on the beach.

I found a way down on to the sand and started pulling massive donuts while driving down the beach. It wasn't a hot tropical beach but more like a British beach - we weren't about to stop and go swimming.

A bit of a way along the beach, there was a club. We stopped, and me and my cousin went in to investigate. As we got closer, I could hear the Stone Roses song Elephant Stone blasting out, when we went in they were playing live. I was shocked by this given that they haven't played live in 15 years.

As we got in and got a good view, it was the full original line up, and Ian Brown was wielding his tambourine in full Manc swagger. I noticed Terry Christian in the crowd, and this detracted from the gig somewhat, as I had to fight the urge to punch him for being so annoying.

Somehow he seemed to notice that I was annoyed and came over and said to him 'Hey, at least I'm not Richard Blackwood'. I had to concede that he had a point, and I was less bothered after that.

At the end of the gig, I realised that a guy I used to work with owned the club, so I went over and had a chat with him. He seemed to be doing really well, but said that he only half-owned the club. He introduced me to the co-owner who was a really scary guy covered in tattoos. Apparently he was up for murder.

We left the club quite quickly, although I seem to have lost my cousin, so made my way back home on foot.

On my way back I got jumped by a bunch of thugs, they didn't hit me or hurt me, but they did nick my bag, which was a bit of a shitter.

Freakiness: 8
Nightmare Factor: 6
Amusement Factor: 6
Enjoyability: 6
Coherence: 4
Vividness: 5